24. February 2011 by pat desmond.

My drug-induced haze disappeared today along with the residual pain of my operation.

The slow draining wounds are healing the way they are meant to heal and I am feeling empowered. The nurse practitioner took the plastic tubing away from my fragile chest and left me feeling practically well.

I meet with my surgeon next week to go over next steps but I’ve gotten through the clearing away stage.

My grandchildren giggle two rooms away while I listen to music to balance my chakras, hoping the darkness will disappear.

I still haven’t read last week’s issue of the Milton Times. I don’t know what the lead story is in the issue out today.

But I don’t hurt. And I’ve had a chance to be with people who matter to me. It’s been a good day.

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22. February 2011 by pat desmond.

My energy hasn’t been electric this week.

It’s been a week since my operation - each day I recover a bit more strength.

My visiting nurse was at my home today with a student shadow. The world is a small place. My nurse knows Ed Baker. She met him a few years ago while he was doing some of his philanthropic work.

The student shadow is from Curry College.

The three of us talked for a time about my degree of pain - which on a 1-10 schedule, I rate as three about a half hour before taking medication. (Truthfully, I expected a great deal of pain and much of the time I’ve been pain-free.)

Since I began telling people about my diagnosis and plans for treatment I’ve heard many stories from friends and acquaintenances about their own cancer stories. I don’t have enough energy to complete more than small pieces of my story.

But each day all that improves.

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19. February 2011 by pat desmond.

The final report from radiology came in late yesterday.

There was a small piece of cancer in my left breast - something unexpected.

So while I am still thinking I may be cancer free because of the bilateral surgery, I know I need to bring more energy to my recovery.

My son is suggesting organic brocoli sprouts. I don’t think it could hurt to try them.

It’s been more than 5 hours since my last pain pill. I’m working towards healing without pain. I think that’s the approach that will work best for me.

I’m opposed to pain. But I know that pain leads to growth.

Truly I think I’ve grown quite enough.

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18. February 2011 by pat desmond.

Read the rest of this entry »

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8. February 2011 by pat desmond.

For the past month I’ve been working to create time in, what has been up to now, my very busy life.

It’s not exactly an option. A week from today I’ll be lying in a hospital bed. I’ve known this day was approaching.

And for the next three weeks I’ll be restricted in my ability to do more than heal. I feel fine today. Most of what I need to do to has been done.

My son will be flying in to Boston from his home in California on the day of my surgery. He’ll be with me for a week.

Then my daughter and her two children will be with me for a few days.

I have a lengthy list of people who have offered to bring soup to my home, or drive me to the doctor’s office, or just stop at the Fruit Center and pick up meals to go.

More information on this simple story will be published soon.

Prayers and well wishes are welcome. But I can’t handle all the emails and phone calls.

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